Mom With A Pen » Surly Mom

Coming Clean

Surly Mom — Sat, 14 Jan 2012 17:41:37 +0000

No, those aren’t maggots. It’s just rice.

You would automatically assume that I was in the kitchen….but the area being scrutinized was my bathtub. Why was there rice on the side of the bathtub? Well, if you’ve been a mom as long as I have, you just don’t ask those questions anymore. Sure, when you had more than four brain cells, you would have turned this into a Sherlock Holmes-worthy whodunit but these days…..maybe you just don’t want to know or even care. You need to preserve those precious remaining brain cells for more important endeavors, such as killing them with a glass of wine at the end of the week while chatting with your best friend about nothing in particular.

Bargain Beauty

Surly Mom — Thu, 10 Mar 2011 14:47:11 +0000

Did you know that March 8th was International Women’s Day? Yes, even my spell checker doesn’t believe me. It is a day set aside to celebrate the achievement of women past, present and future. Yeah, I didn’t get the memo. I spent it at home, doing laundry and taking care of my children. I’m pretty sure I didn’t have shoes on for most of the day either.

If You Give a Mom a Cup of Joe….

Surly Mom — Mon, 07 Mar 2011 15:30:26 +0000

If you give a mom a cup of joe,

she might just ponder way too long why it’s called joe. Couldn’t it be a better name? Joe is just not very exciting and the Joes that I have known…well, let’s just say I don’t really want to be drinking a big cup of them or anything they might be oozing.

Just Another Day in Fabuless

Surly Mom — Mon, 10 Jan 2011 20:21:49 +0000

Welcome to today’s installment of:

Poo or Chocolate?

Yes, yes once again it’s time for every parent’s favorite guessing game where we use our extraordinary powers of deduction to decide cocoa or kaka?

Over the Nest

Surly Mom — Mon, 04 Oct 2010 17:42:59 +0000

I catch myself thinking sometimes about my toddler in a most un-mom like fashion. I’ll watch her going about her toddler business, whether that is her wanting to put her shoes on before she puts any of her clothes on (undies included) or her wanting to eat everything with a spoon…chips included. I look at her and think….if she were an adult…she’d be in the looney bin.

Where the Wild Things Are

Surly Mom — Mon, 27 Sep 2010 16:56:26 +0000

I was waiting in the checkout line the other day in Target, reading the magazine covers. Among all teasers that promise you slenderness secrets, fashion forwardness and vixen vivacity, I found this little nugget:

Read more on Where the Wild Things Are…

What do Wolves Eat?

Surly Mom — Mon, 16 Aug 2010 15:51:29 +0000

I spent the better part of Thursday morning waiting in an auditorium filled with parents and children. Just my luck, I happened to be seated in the row directly in front of two young ladies who have spent a few years honing their skills to near perfection in “teen speak.” Every now and again, I’d lean over to my daughter and mutter, “If you ever…..” After the first hour, I was begging for sharp implements with which to stab my eardrums and put me out of my misery.

Mommy and Me

Surly Mom — Wed, 04 Aug 2010 16:56:36 +0000

I’ve been trying to get this “Urban Mom” thing down for some time now. The last time I was mom to a toddler, flannel was on the way out and the coolest thing out of Seattle was a coffee company that based its business plan on rabbit husbandry. Not to mention, I lived in the “sticks.” I did the retro version of parenting based on my own upbringing. It’s called, “Go outside and play!”

What’s Mine is Yours………Not!

Surly Mom — Thu, 01 Jul 2010 17:36:20 +0000

Okay, I know the “Not” in the title is a bit dated but I just spent the weekend looking at big hair pictures and barraged by 80′s music (eesh). Isn’t everything 80′s back in style now, anyways?

I Did It and I’d Do It Again

Surly Mom — Tue, 29 Jun 2010 17:23:03 +0000

Motherhood is…. cleaning a never-ending expanse of tile floor on your hands and knees while a toddler follows you around with juicebox in hand.

I find myself uttering nonsensical nuggets of knowledge such as, “We don’t eat with socks on our hands.”