Life has a funny way of saying, “Hey, what the heck. Are you an idiot?” And often, I’ll reply, “Yup;” sometimes when someone is looking… just to make them think twice about sitting next to me… because everyone needs their space. Yes, I’ve been walking in a daze. Let me add to that…for the past year and a half. Half exhausted from my non-sleeping one-year-old (and the whining and tantrums of the six-year-old); half carb-induced because I can’t seem to stop shoveling in chicken nachos. What is it with that stuff? Umm…yes, I’m eating a heap now.
In the past two weeks I’ve realized a lot of things. (Besides the fact that I should be working at a Tex-Mex cantina for the chip-age con dip-age.) Turning 40 recently put me into mid-life crisis mode with a twist. Mamacita got a new pair of shoes, a new head of hair and a $48 box of eye shadow. I really don’t know what alien possessed my brain, but did you ever see the movie, “Kick Ass?” Geeks gone wild because of a costume? All I needed was a cape. And no, I wasn’t out fighting crime…just maturity. It’s on-going.
Today, Mother’s Day, I sat and watched as my youngest threw blueberries on the floor of a fancy restaurant, and my eldest pouted because I scolded her for her sassy attitude. Yes, for a minute I thought about getting up and leaving. I glanced at my husband, who was in the midst of offering me a bite of his dinner. The look in his eyes told me that everything would be ok. That’s when we paid, we all left and then I made him spend the next 45 minutes in Charming Charlie with me and the girls…for payback.
The fact is, no matter what material objects we have (or don’t have) and no matter what we wear (or don’t wear)… nobody really makes it “ok.” Other people may not be able to get past our saggy jeans and our unruly and tied back ponytail…and the flip-flops from 1992. But more importantly, can we?
Even though I’m touting the SAHM handshake with dribble on my collar, the mini-make0ver really has done a lot for my inner-smile. So what if I have low self esteem. (You know, the kind that would run Stewart Smalley back into therapy.) I don’t know, I don’t think I’ve been this happy since 1995. Now if I could only get past swimsuit season.
I’ve never been a “spend a dime, get back some time” kind of girl. If I’m left complaining that my face has a wrinkle in it, I’ll get out the iron but I’m not likely to spend $50 for a one-ounce of “Oil of Oh Heeeey!” But, after this past two weeks I am picketing for pretty across the nation. Mamas of the world need a pedicure and a good meal every once in a while. *shouting, “More pumice…less humus!” * Really, we do.
Take it from frumpy, who is still in search of Crest Whitening Strips. “Mama’s got a brand new bag” means more than “Watch out or I’ll hit you with it.” After all, those pair of jeans that I accidentally bought two sizes too small, but still force myself to squeeze into, seemingly have come in handy. I hate laundry. Don’t look now! No really, don’t…because the button is about to pop off and might ricochet off your eyeball. They are stretchy jeans. In short, I don’t think it mattered that I only spent $13 on those crazy jeans. They made me feel incredible.
All I’m saying is: Don’t be afraid to take a moment for yourself. You don’t have to spend 3 hours getting ready to go to Chuck-E-Sneeze, but you will feel so much better if you get to take a shower, wash your hair and put a little lip gloss on.
Enough said.
I usually go through this every February; I suspect it is part of cabin fever. Since my recent, albeit disastrous, foray into the working world, I am trying a bit harder in the appearance department. I even wore a dress (and jewelry) to church on Mother’s Day!
Then again, part of me is whispering that I can really go without a haircut all summer long…..